Balance sheet â€“ a place to hide the other side of a fictitious transaction.
Income statement â€“ a description of the money that companies donâ€™t really make, but show to investors.
Cash flow statement â€“ a description of how companies take money from their investors and give it to their top executives.
Accountant â€“ someone hired to explain how companies really made more money than they actually did.
Accounting standards â€“ a group of words that allow companies to do anything they want to do.
Big bath â€“ How companies take a $2 per share loss and make it into a $4 per share loss so next yearâ€™s loss wonâ€™t look nearly so bad.
Bottom line â€“ the tip of the iceberg.
Derivative â€“ a financial instrument that is derived with the idea of stealing your money.
Financial instrument â€“ similar to a medical instrument used for small, dark places.
Off-balance-sheet financing â€“ a technique used when you canâ€™t find a reasonable place to put the other side of the entry.
Principles vs. rules â€“ a choice of ways that accountants and companies can use accounting standards to confuse investors.
Smoothing â€“ a technique of reversing reserves that shouldnâ€™t have been recorded in the first place.
Stock options â€“ a financial instrument where the company has the option of screwing the IRS or the investors.
Source: Accounting Ethics Blog